Knowing What We Don’t Know

He was a young man, Stephen, straight from MBA school. In every meeting he’d apply what he’d learned from this book or from that professor. He’d forget that his audience was 7 or 8 people who’d each been in business since before he knew what business was.

He could analyze, organize, spreadsheet, posit, and problem solve, but mostly we thought of him as “school smart and business naive.” Oh yeah, he knew plenty that we didn’t. Only, some days he didn’t know what he didn’t know … and he forgot that we knew things too.

I Called Him My Irritating Little Brother

I liked him, even when he had his head stick in invisible books. On Fridays he’d “dress down” to business casual, even though the rest of us wore jeans all week — and he’d get all self-conscious when he did. That’s when I thought of him my Irritating Little Brother. The affection helped on occasions like this one.

In one meeting, Stephen proposed a fairly classic plan of action. I gently tried to point out a possible hole in his approach to our situation.

“That’s inconsequential,” he said, brushing my thoughts aside with a musical word.
I smiled and replied, “Thank you!” with overdone joy and enthusiasm.
He stopped, looked at me, and replied, “What?”
Bigger smile. “Inconsequential. I haven’t had that word tossed my way for the longest time.”
He was stunned. Then he smiled back and listened. He made had room for experience that didn’t come from school.

Breaking Out of the Repeating Conversation

Stephen wasn’t necessarily arrogant or even intentionally narrow-minded. But he hadn’t considered an approach other than his own — which is to say, a linear, traditional approach. And he hadn’t considered his audience — people with real-world, complex business problems that might not be solved with an academically choreographed, sequenced formula.

What Stephen needed was to channel his learnings and solicit tested techniques and ideas from his colleagues. Together, they could discuss, debate, and collaborate solutions, all the while learning valuable lessons from one another.

Stephen would better understand that learning and solutions needn’t be centered around heavily vetted models and dogma. And that people need to be engaged if you hope to be able to lead and guide them. The audience could learn practical ideas from one another, while gaining an appreciation for how traditional texts could be applied to real situations.

In the world of the digital gap, there’s two sides to this argument.

Some folks are Business Smart, but don’t value the Virtual Conversation.
Some folks are so Social Media Smart that we’ve lost our Concrete footing.
It’s easy to get stuck repeating what we already know.

Hopefully the folks who listen say, “Thank you” and share what they know anyway.

Got some words of wisdom for breaking out of a repeating conversation?

Heather Rast writes at Insights&Ingenuity about the delicate balance between achievement and growth.

and me well, you already know.

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

JOIN US TONIGHT AT 7PM

I Hear the Late Jokes Already

Oh, and bring example links.

The rules are simple — be nice.

Do be nice.

–ME “Liz” Strauss

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Our neighborhood was the greatest space. It offered football-field-sized back yard, a huge (never filled) lot great for running down. It rolled all the way to the tree lined river bank. The river behind was an inlet, the dead end of a branching off. The our front streets were clean and wide without much traffic. The houses were occupied by quiet people with big kids who had already used what was around each of them every day. Now they went on dates and went to college.

The grown ups probably always had been too busy working to get to know each other.

But by the time I came along. the neighborhood wasn’t much more than a huge space that people came to eat and sleep.

His name was Craig. I met him when he ran across the street the day that he moved in. He was wiry, smiling, energy. I was long, curious, sincerity. He was a smarter Charlie Brown. I was a nicer Lucy.

For a little guy, his voice was deep and slurry. I told my mom his name was “Ray.” He was 4. I was 5.

The big kids totally ignored us. But as it was we didn’t have time to find things boring.
We called it “going exploring.” We rolled down hills, walked river banks, climbed rocks, learned to skip a stone the hard way. We laid back under trees and talked about the shapes the leaves would make. We heard the lectures about grass stains.

We watched my younger, older brother cut the huge backyard in the shape of baseball diamond. I spent my birthday money knowing we’d play with what I brought home. We got generous (and in trouble) picking Rose’s peonies for our mothers. We didn’t know weren’t supposed to. Still Rose and Elmer still gave us pinwheel cookies when we cut through their yard.

And we got a little cranky, our moms would send us outside with two lawn chairs, some KoolAid, our lunch, and tell us to play the Traffic Game. We might have seen about 10 cars an hour.

The rules to the Traffic Game were simple …

• Choose a color. (Craig always choose blue or red — his favorite colors. I picked the best seller.)
• Count the cars of that color that drive by.
• The winner was the first to get to 21. It took a while.

We’d always start, but we never knew who won the game — it’s hard to have fun when you’re playing a game someone else made up..

We would do so many other fun things. We’d start with conversation — like the grownups had the kitchen table. That was while we got our lunch out of the way. We made up sci-fi stories about the people in the cars. We wondered how my school had letter grades when his school didn’t have report cards?

When lunch was officially over, we would use Craig’s magnifying glass to burn holes in the paper towel that had wrapped our sandwiches.

One day, we held auditions for a circus act. We held that magnifying glass to light a path for each fat black ant on the sidewalk — you might note fat black ants don’t have the right discipline to be in a circus.

In the middle of this serious auditioning, another kid ran up with a butterscotch cocker spaniel at his heels. He wanted to know what we were doing.

He said his name was Scotty. He lived in the house next door to Craig and his birthday was two days and two years after mine. We started showing him around. A few months later another family moved in, the three of us showed them the best way to attack the sledding hill and where to sit when you put your ice skates on by the river.

And in the spring, the six McGuire girls came — in time to see yard where the Tulip lady has tulips of every color and a windmill. It was a bike ride so close their parents wouldn’t mind. We learned the Dutch words for “Will you put on those wooden shoes by the door?”

By the time that Craig was 7 and I was 8, we had a community. We put on the best carnivals. Our parents paid to attend them. Our big brothers brought their big friends, including the girls — the ones they liked a lot. By then we’d sit our moms in chairs like this to watch the plays that we put on.

By the next summer the whole neighborhood was watching fireworks on lawn chairs and blankets in the huge backyard down by the river. Craig and I were trying to figure out who might star in our next community show.

That’s how small communities grow.

How does this align your ideas of how communities are and how they grow?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

It came to us while walking on the beach last week.

You know how, what with Facebook and Twitter and Plurk and all the other social networking communities we all have these hundreds or thousands of friends online? Well, what if we were to friend some of those people we see offline?

That’s right, friends we can talk to, hang out with, but without having a keyboard or microphone or videocam to help us communicate!

Novel idea.

What triggered this particular brainwave, which we are currently seeking to trademark as “Friends in the Flesh”, was when, as we say, we were walking on the beach.

Now just by way of background, when we walk on the beach early in the morning there are several people we see most days. Some form of greeting or acknowledgement is exchanged, ranging from a hearty “Good Morning! Beautiful day!”, through to a friendly but fairly emotionless nod. You always know who the visitors holidaying from the city are: if you say “Good morning!” they look at you nervously and might manage a smile but you know their city reflexes have them suddenly in fight or flight mode.

Anyhow, the other day, a chap we’ve actually chatted with a few times and another who has been in the “nod or make a small, unostentatious sort of waving motion with the hand” category of morning beachgoers, stopped us to actually introduce themselves by name and discover our names.

Now when we see them it’s all “Suzie!”, “Des!”, “Pat!” and “Greg!” - and since they have introduced us to another of their friends, “Grahame!”.

We discovered we like this and now we are on a bit of a campaign to get to know the names of the other regulars.

Who knows where this could lead? The League of Offline Friends perhaps? With a list, in - what do they call it - a printed book?

Given the instantaneousness of friending on Facebook and following/being followed on Twitter, the four years or so it has taken for us to know the names of people we greet every day and have them know our names, and even stop for the occasional chat, seems - no, is - an extraordinary amount of time.

Is it possible, while we build amazing and multitudinous friendships online, that we are neglecting - literally walking past - opportunities for friendships in our offline lives?

What if 2009 were to be a year when we did some serious offline friending? Going beyond the wave or the non-committal half-smile exchange with people we see every day or regularly but really know nothing about to exchanging names and even having a chat or two.

A chat offline? You mean it’s ok to do that? Cool.

Do you have a story to tell about going from a “courtesy” wave or nod to actually friending someone offline? Care to share, here?

Suzie Cheel and Des Walsh wishing everyone an wonderful friendful 2009.

and the right to call themselves
Successful Blog SOBs.

I invite them to take a badge home to display on their blogs.

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They take the conversation to their readers,
contribute great ideas, challenge us, make us better, and make our businesses stronger.

I thank all of our SOBs for thinking what we say is worth passing on.
Good conversation shared can only improve the blogging community.

Should anyone question this SOB button’s validity, send him or her to me. Thie award carries a “Liz said so” guarantee, is endorsed by Kings of the Hemispheres, Martin and Michael, and is backed by my brothers, Angelo and Pasquale.

Want to become an SOB?

If you’re an SO-Wanna-B, you can see the whole list of SOBs and learn how to be one by visiting the SOB Hall of Fame– A-Z Directory . Click the link or visit the What IS an SOB?! page in the sidebar.

–ME “Liz” Strauss

You might remember the story I told about when I was a kid … how my mom would sit us down with the Wishbook from Sears to make a Christmas wish list …. My list kept me busy for hours — busy dreaming, and wishing, and learning the life skill of filling out order forms.

Every year my mom would grant one wish.

This year, Sears let me be the one who got to grant a wish in the the $500 Grant a Wish Giveaway!

The assignment was simple. I got to test drive a $500 gift at a SEARS store and then I had to put together three packages so that one lucky winner could use a wish from the three.

The randomly chosen winner is Jennifer Hedden. Her entry was comment #402 on my blog and she chose

Cool Tools Wish

• Craftsman NEXTEC™ 12 Volt Lithium-Ion Hammerhead Auto Hammer
  Sears item # 00911818000 Mfr.model # 11818 $99.99
• Craftsman Long Life LED/Lighted Safety Glasses
  Sears item # 03493338000 Mfr.model # SG-SEA-10 $19.99
• Craftsman LED Lighted Hat
  Sears item # 03493344000 Mfr.model # CL-SEA-10 $11.99
• Craftsman AccuTrac Laser Measuring Tool
  Sears item # 00948298000 Mfr.model # 48298 $99.99
• Streamlight Stinger LED Flashlight
  Sears item # 03414100000 Mfr.model # 14100 $149.00
• DeWalt 7.2 volt Screwdriver Kit, Cordless
  Sears item # 00926924000 Mfr.model # DW920K-2 $89.99
• DeWalt 37 pc. Screwdriver Bit Set with Case
  Sears item # 00925897000 Mfr.model # DW2163 $28.99

Thank you everyone for making this experiment in blogging (and time travel) such a positive and fun experience for me.

Congratulations, Jennifer! An email has already been sent to you. I feel pretty lucky to be able to be part of all of this. Hope you and every one have the best 2009!

–ME “Liz” Strauss

The contest was sponsored. For more information about the sponsor SEARS or the contest see Izea.
It’s the spirit of the season!! Thank you.

My younger older brother was bigger than life He wa the coolest kid in the neighborhood. I was 8 and half years younger. I watched him all my life and I learned.

He was instant community. He was kind of like Tom Sawyer. He could smile around a corner.

• He had 5 girlfriends before he was 10.
• If he said “baseball,” the team formed before he finished the word.
• If he said, “hockey,” the ice was cleared and smooth.
• Kids called him “Bugs” and I never knew whether it was because of the famous bunny or the Las Vegas gambler. They were always too busy laughing to tell me.
• He’s the one who had me trained to come when he whistled.
• He still has a magnetic personality.

Grownups, teachers, kids, … everyone enjoyed his company.

Problem was some kids tried to be him.
Maybe we all did.

It never worked. Our voices were different. He was taller or his smile had a different tilt. We just became bad copies of my younger, older brother, instead of the really cool kids that we were.

So Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up trying to be Chris Brogan. He’s as magic as my younger, older brother … but only Chris Brogan can be Chris Brogan. Tell your babies to be an original.

Everyone has our own magic.

I know. I’ve been watching all my life.

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

When I was growing up, my cousins across town couldn’t care less about the shows
we put on in our backyards.

We had to win over the folks who knew us before we thought about taking on the world.

See any similarities to the Internet?

–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz!!

The week that just passed was a week of celebration, visiting with family and friends, old and new, feasting and fun for many. It was also a time for reflection about the year drawing to a close and planning for the year ahead – the year that begins with this day. I hope you had a positive week and took some time for rejuvenation and some time for yourself.

There’s been a lot of talk in the blogosphere, on twitter and other platforms about what not to do, how to increase SEO, suggestions about what to write and how to write it and lots of advice. I hope in your time of reflection and planning you thought about your original intent with respect to your writing. I’d like to think you incorporate all you have learned but keep true to those intentions and continue writing in a genuine way that reflects what you really want to say.

I wish for you a peaceful and creative New Year.

Kathryn @northernchick

Thanks to Maura McGovern for the wonderful picture.

Here’s how it works.

It’s like any rambling conversation. Don’t try to read it all. Jump in whenever you get here. Just go to the end and start talking. EVERYONE is WELCOME.
The rules are simple — be nice.

There are always first timers and new things to talk about. It’s sort of half “Cheers” part “Friends” and part video game. You don’t know how much fun it is until you try it.

What Is Your Wish, Your Will for the Year to Come?

Leave a wish, a word, a thought.
Leave a hope, a goal, a want.
Leave a message for a friend or the world.
Set it here for us all to remember.
Leave one or one hundred.

Happy New Year!

–ME “Liz” Strauss
image: sxc.hu
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