[For those of you just tuning in, this is based on the 301 Lists that Darren Rowse’s List Group Writing Project brought together. You’ll find Chapter 1 here –> A List Becomes 301 Links in Story — Chapter 1 ]

Adventures Don’t Happen Sitting

Lizzie finished her hot chocolate and talked a moment to her server. Apparently the owner was a Jerk. Lizzie wanted to help the poor girl so she gave her Ten Things You Need to Know Before you Hire an Attorney and Starting Your Own Business? Keep these things in Mind!

“Everyone’s so nice and speaking English,” Lizzie thought. Then she scanned the lists on the table. On her left she saw Pan Pacs 2006 – What to Watch For, European Honeymoon List Fun, 20 Ways to Improve Your Training for Rowers (and other Athletes), Ingredients in Chinese Five Spice, and Five Things to Do in Stockholm When it Rains. On her right was Things I learned in Honduras, 20 Drought Tolerant Australian Native Plants, A few handy EPL team facts, and 5 things to do when in Cebu.

Right-brained, creative Lizzie did the math. “Oh my,” she thought, “Only 7% of Americans have passports. “We really need to stop our national journey to be in front of the TV,” our fictional deep thinker mused as she reviewed Five Searches That Have Brought People to Couch Culture. “Just that I’m in France and not in a noisy tourist group has probably led them to decide that I’m Australian or Canadian. I think number 11 of 10 Easy Ways To Save Money In Restaurants is to leave as soon as you’re done.”

And that’s exactly what she did.

Along Came Rita . . . and Doris

In the fresh air and out on the sidewalk, Lizzie headed for Notre Dame Cathedral.

Unfortunately, she ended up in a that stereotypical, noisy group of American tourists and couldn’t quite seem to lose a lady named Rita. Rita was an incredibly thin, well-meaning real-estate seller — the kind that makes most realtors cringe or claim to be lawyers, ex-cons, or major felons . . . Worse than Rita was her friend, Doris, a burly pitbull sort of woman who was an American TV fiend.
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[For those of you just tuning in, this is based on the 301 Lists that Darren Rowse’s List Group Writing Project brought together. You’ll find Chapter 1 here –> A List Becomes 301 Links in Story — Chapter 1 ]

In Paris at Last

Finally, Lizzie was in the Paris Hilton. She was overjoyed to find that her room had been upgraded. That, of course, required a room tour to see what was there.

The room was so cool. It was Beyond YouTube and Google Video: 5 Great Video Sites on the Web were in the bathroom!

The desk had 10 Things You Find in Every Office. A note by the interactive television offered Ebay Scam/Hoax Avoidance Tips and 10 Everyday Items You Can Buy with E-gold.

A case in the library included the framed hotel plans and The architects Pen. The writer’s desk included a book that invited visitors to add to My Top 10 Favorite Desperate Housewives Moments. (The first entry was signed by Prince Charles.)

The bar was stocked with Sam Adams Top Ten Beers.

Lizzie grabbed a cold one and cracked it open. She sat back to contemplate. “Boy this really underscores 10 Things I hate about budget Traveling.” Then Listless Lizzie couldn’t quit laughing. I’ve landed in The Budget Travel Wishlist of Moi.

To Lizzie, camping and budget traveling always involved room service and chocolate-covered strawberries.

Memories and Hot Chocolate

Once she could breathe again, she realized a nap was in order. She’d flown all night and needed some sleep. She called up A Short List of Lists, but it was too short. Then she tried AAA list of 11 important advantages to list writing, but she couldn’t remember them all without the paperwork. So she settled on repeating the name of A List of Lists for Listing as a mantra.

By the beautiful bed, Lizzie found more reading material to calm her — 11 Ways to Improve Clarity and Start Getting Results. She thought she would meditate on that for a while and she would read 10 Ways to Improve Your Energy when she awoke from her nap.

As she was falling asleep her last thought was, “I remember Top 7 Freebies I’ve received,” she sighed. I miss that Photo Project that empowered me so. I miss Jay Leno and the other boys, who wanted to drive The Top Ten Hybrid Cars in my garage. She’d always thought those cars were the best test and trial in her plan of How to Find the Perfect Man. She thought back on 5 things I wish I knew when I bought my first motorcycle. Laughing she realized they were the same 5 things she wished she knew when she dated her first boyfriend too.

“Yeah,” she thought. “I should write a book on that. It would be like Extended Car Warranty Do’s and Don’ts for relationships.”

But whenever the idea of the perfect man arose, so too came the 10 Things: Married or Single. One of which is 10 Steps to a Happier Mealtime with Kids, then there was What to Bring on a Roadtrip with Kids, and not to mention the stuff her friend, Georgio, called “College Planning, Suffering, and the Avarice of Ray Charles; The Top 5 Things My Kids Have Said That Still Make me Laugh.” The little girl shook her head. She thought most guys were kids themselves. She knew for sure that she was.

When Lizzie awoke she was ready for an adventure.

On her way out of the room she saw a brochure that said, “Get More Done in a Day: Do Little Things, Achieve Big Things.”

“Exactly,” she said out loud.

She left the hotel and started wandering aimlessly.

In the Coffee Bar

It was in the Coffee Bar near Maxims that Lizzie met Jean, he was 5 foot 9 inches tall. His hair and frame were both wiry. His eyes were black and fiery. There was no doubt he was both romantic and creative. Jean had “You Must be an Artist If… “ written all over him. [Read more…]