The Universe Falls Out of Balance …
Communities grow and change. We do too. It would be unrealistic to expect that a community of people would stay static. Would we really want it to? It would be hard for us to grow, innovate, and build new things without the dynamic change of a community’s ebb and flow.
But it’s a sad and serious thing when a community starts to lose the energy and interest that made it a community. It’s even sadder when that happens just as things start going good.
It can happen to anyone — you, me, our best friends. We’re on a team and a great thing happens! We get some applause and attention! New “friends and followers” start showing up and new opportunities start appearing. Strangers start joining in the fun. Then, our favorite people quit showing up.
What? Right when things start going good, the good ones start going?
Really … well, sometimes yes.
But you can bet it’s not them, its us.
When that happens more often than not, we’ve quit thinking about the community and they’ve noticed.
When the world starts to revolve around us, people move away and the universe flies out of balance.
How to Recognize and Recover When You’ve Started Believing Your Own PR
In the fray and frolic of good things happening, we can grow faster than fast. Networks explode and bandwidth becomes slim. All at once, a mother lode of new expectations and rewards are sitting within reach. Possibilities and potential are right there, but … they require new discipline and focus.
People don’t decide to make the world revolve around them. People decide to take the new work, the new calling seriously. We forget that if we focus too hard on the work, we can make it more important than the people the work is meant to serve. Most of us would be embarrassed to think we ever did. Most of the people we know won’t tell us if that’s the road we’ve landed on.
So, how do you recognize and recover when you’ve made yourself the center of the universe? How do you win back the folks who’ve decided that you’ve gone to the dark side of believing your own PR?
- When you ask people about their business, their life, their goals, does everything they say come back to a story about you? People who live in the center of the universe are self-focused. Name an event from the Big Bang to a cat that had kittens. People in the center can easily tell you how it proves or illustrates something about them. To recover: Care more about why someone is telling you a story than what you might have to say in response.
- Do you have the same conversation with everyone? If you’re bringing the same story to every conversation, you’re not considering the person who is listening. Folks like to talk about beautiful ideas and compelling stories — things worth sharing. Conversations are meant to be an exchange. To recover: Listen more than you talk. Give people a chance to ask how you are and they’ll be more inclined to care.
- Have people stopped listening when you talk? It’s the Boy Who Cried Wolf. Folks figure out that people in center of the universe are stuck inside the stories they tell. They don’t bother, because they know a person has to want to leave the center of the universe. To recover: Find the rewards for being part of the world where everyone interacts and come back.
- Does it seem like people only want, want, want? Do you feel surrounded by people who take and people who feel sorry for themselves? Misery loves company. Winners form a circle. To recover:Wire your head back to your heart. Be the kind of person you admire and want as a friend and supporter.
We don’t need to “believe our own PR,” when we really know who we are.
Success is about helping other folks reach their goals.
The universe does fine without us — the people we serve are the reason to be us.
Be irresistible.
–ME “Liz” Strauss
Work with Liz on your business!!
__________
