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How-To Find Success: Believing in Yourself!

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Ben Newman

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How-To Find Success: Believing in Yourself!

The world is moving at an ever faster pace, and it can be a challenge just to keep up, let alone get ahead. Where do your dreams fit in when you put everything into keeping a job or running a business? Is success just about the bottom line? What do you do when you have the big house and the fancy cars but your life is still stressful and empty? How do you have meaningful relationships when your success depends on you being in control?

No one makes a conscious choice to wake up one day completely overwhelmed and disconnected from the things that matter most — but, it happens to many of us. Often we don’t even realize we’ve gotten off course until we crash and burn, a spouse leaves, a business fails, an illness strikes, and we’re forced to re-examine our priorities. The good news is, it’s never too late to make a change, and you don’t have to wait for the sky to fall before you make it.

With all the noise about the economy, elections, and what is happening around the world, it is easy to fall into the trap of trying to believe two contradictory points:

a) that everything is beyond your control, and
b) in order to succeed you have to control everything.

The truth is actually the opposite.

a)You always have control over the only thing that matters: yourself. That is to say, you have total control over how you choose to act and what you choose to believe in any given moment, in any given circumstance, and
b) in order to succeed, you have to let go of controlling others and of controlling the outcome.

Five Key Factors for Attaining Belief in Yourself

The place to start is with a belief in yourself and I’ve outlined the Five Key Factors for Attaining Belief in Yourself in my book, “Own YOUR Success”:

  1. Accept the truth. Acknowledging the person you are today is the key to becoming the person you want to be and ultimately, attaining belief in yourself. There is a big difference between failing and not getting the results we want. Instead of seeing failure, see opportunities for growth and change.
  2. Speak the truth. Be honest about your past behaviors and habits. While it may be difficult to acknowledge them, burying those parts of our lives makes us feel like victims, amplifying our fear and pain. Shedding light on the past, by talking with a trusted friend or professional, frees us.
  3. Breathe through the truth. Avoid reacting from a place of pain or anger — no matter how much you believe you are right. Be open to changing your perspective. Treat yourself lovingly. Do not self-destruct.
  4. Process the truth. Give yourself time and space to find your equilibrium. Developing belief in yourself means gaining confidence that will lead to a stronger foundation.
  5. Create a plan based on the truth. Changing entrenched behaviors and mindsets takes time, and sometimes they return. Stay strong. Continue to believe and actively engage in this process. Define how you want to live your life from where you are right now.

If you can master these Five Key Factors for Attaining Belief in Yourself, you will be well on your way to achieving the kind of success you really dream of success that incorporates balance in all areas of your life.

Author’s Bio:
Ben Newman writes and speaks to inspire and motivate people to take actionable steps in their personal and professional lives to achieve the success they dream of. He is the author of “Own YOUR Success.” View his website at http://bennewman.net/ and connect with him on Twitter as @ContinuedFight

Thank you for adding to the conversation! So with you on that, Ben!

–ME “Liz” Strauss

Happiness and Success

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Recently, as part of “switch” among fellow bloggers, I wrote post for LinkedIntelligence, called How My Blog Turbo Powers My LinkedIn Connections. Now Liz Fuller, from Business and Blogging, has graciously offered one on success for us here. I’ll let Liz explain further. . .

b5media is mixing things up this month by creating a “blog scramble”. Bloggers are writing guest posts for fellow b5media bloggers. I was excited that I was matched up with Liz Strauss’ Successful blog. I’m a big fan. And this opportunity gives me a chance to write about a different passion than my usual posts on Business and Blogging.

Happiness and Success
by Liz Fuller

When I’m not blogging or working, I’m pursuing a PhD in organizational psychology. One of my favorite areas of study is positive psychology and the research that has been done by Ed Diener on the linkages between success and happiness.

Now, you may be thinking – big surprise – “people who are successful are happy”.

But wait! The research shows that the order is actually reversed – people who are happy tend to become more successful!!

For the sake of this research, success is defined as having good relationships, good health and earning an above average income!

Researchers are not sure of the reason for the relationship, but it appears that people who are happy tend to draw positive people and experiences to them.

The secret to success then may be to focus first on being happy.

I try to do this by remembering on most days to:

  • take time to be grateful for everything I already have in my life
  • enjoy time with my family and friends
  • give myself a break when it comes to my own faults and foibles
  • listen to music, read for pleasure and watch the sun rise
  • learn something new every day
  • help someone else, even if it is simply taking the time to listen

What about you? What do you do to increase the happiness in your life? Do you think it is possible to consciously make yourself happier? Do you agree that the secret to success in life is to first be happy?

–Liz Fuller writes for Business and Blogging

Thanks, Liz!

–ME “Liz” Strauss